If you read Part 1, you know I’m about to reveal one easy thing you can do to get and stay in the mood for sex:  KISSING!

Sex therapist and author Joyce Penner say this in my book:

If there was one key to leave you with, it would be to kiss passionately.  When he knows I’m going to kiss passionately every day, but it has nothing to do with whether I want sex tonight – it has to do with “I love you” and it feels so good – it’s going to keep my pilot light on so I can get more turned-on on a regular basis.  We love kissing.

I love that analogy of keeping the pilot light turned on.  I used to be afraid to kiss passionately.  After all, my husband might interpret all that kissing as a prelude to sex.  So what tends to happen?  We stop kissing our husbands.

And before we know it, we’ve been reduced to what author and psychologist Dr. David Clarke calls the pathetic little peck kiss, the sound effect kiss from across the room, or the dreaded kiss on the cheek.  Dr. Clarke from page 110 of 31 Days to a Happy Husband,

Kissing is ongoing work.   It’s not like the movies where you have all the chemistry.  That’s always true early in the relationship, but the movies don’t take us all the way through.  Culture says, You can’t have it decade after decade.  Don’t expect that.  You’re going to get divorced and move on and find someone else.  Well that’s not what God says.  You’ve got to keep those romantic behaviors going.  The make-out sessions are very important during the week.  It’s leading up to the main event, but that may be a day or two away.  All that anticipation is part of the deal.  It’s wonderful.

So, pucker up!  To get in the mood for sex, add daily kissing the recipe.  Tell your man every time your lips lock, that’s not the go signal for sex.  It just means you want to kiss more.  Chances are, he’ll be just fine with that.  And all that extra kissing will help keep the pilot light on.

Arlene Pellicane

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