I thee wedWhen James and I were engaged, we were meeting with our wedding coordinator at the church.  There just happened to be a wedding happening simultaneously.  After our meeting, we were walking through the lobby and noticed the wedding party getting ready to begin the procession.

James pushed me over to a side door, pretending he was a spy, and said, “Okay, we’ve got visual contact with the bride.  Let’s get ready to roll!”  He crouched at the side door, took out his imaginary gun, and pretty much acted out a scene from Mission Impossible.

I was horrified.

What if someone saw us acting like super spies?  I said in the most serious voice I could muster, “Sweetheart.  This is not funny.  This is someone’s wedding.  Let’s leave quietly.”

This of course made it funnier to James who now laid it on even thicker.  “Get down, hide, they’re coming!”  He ran to a side door.  Now I’m more embarrassed because we’re mobile.  I just wanted to get in the car and drive away.

That moment didn’t play out well for us.  Remember we were there at the church to meet with the wedding coordinator.  What was supposed to be fun turned into a fight.

We both left the church that we soon would be married in upset.  He was wondering, “Why is she such a killjoy?”  I was thinking, “I can’t believe he is so inappropriate!”

Doesn’t this tension exist in marriages today?  Why can’t he be more serious?  Why can’t she be more fun? (or vice versa).

Over the years, James has tempered down a bit, and I’ve tried to be more easy going and relaxed.  But since James’ antics provide great stories for my books, I’m trying to welcome adventure and laughter more and more.

When you go on your Valentine’s date this month, remember…it’s supposed to be fun.

Life is so serious – work, bills, mortgage, carpooling schedules – give yourself and your spouse a break and have fun.  Don’t talk about to-dos or scheduling when you’re out on a date.  Kiss, giggle and have fun.

And who knows, you may even want to crash a wedding!  (Just kidding, don’t do that…)

Arlene Pellicane

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